I'm Not Your Shrink

Dr. Tracy Dalgleish

Are you ready to let go of what isn't truly you and live a more meaningful life? If you answered yes, you've come to the right place! Enter I'm Not Your Shrink, a podcast hosted by clinical psychologist and couples therapist Dr. Tracy Dalgleish. Each week, she combines her clinical knowledge, evidence-based research, and personal experiences as a wife and mother to address the everyday issues we all face. With over 17 years of experience, Dr. Tracy is on a mission to help couples break old patterns, find joy in their relationships, and empower themselves to show up meaningfully for their families, relationships, and, most importantly, themselves. While she isn't your shrink, you are invited each week to join Dr. Tracy as she sits down with fellow clinicians, experts, and partner in both business and life, her husband Greg, for insightful discussions on parenting, relationships, and personal growth, and start your journey towards a happier, healthier you. read less
Niños y familiaNiños y familia

Episodios

How to Get Your Partner to Go to Therapy
15-08-2024
How to Get Your Partner to Go to Therapy
In the season finale of the podcast, Dr. Tracy tackles one of her most frequently asked questions: "How do I get my partner to go to therapy?" But first, she has a special announcement to share: she's writing her second book! Dr. Tracy then dives into the importance of starting therapy early in a relationship to build trust, enhance communication, and address issues before they become critical. She discusses the challenges many couples face, especially when one partner is hesitant, often due to stigma or fear of blame. She shares strategies for encouraging a reluctant partner, including empathetic communication, understanding their concerns, and approaching the conversation with care. The episode also explores the benefits of therapy, such as identifying and changing negative cycles, fostering personal growth, and deepening emotional connection. Dr. Tracy encourages listeners to be patient, respect their partner's pace, and consider therapy as a tool to strengthen and sustain their relationship.  Leave Dr. Tracy a voicemail here!  A special thank you to our incredible sponsors for making this show possible! Cozy Earth - Visit cozyearth.com and use code SHRINK at checkout for an exclusive 35% off. Links: Ready to deepen your connection? Download my 100 Questions!  Want your questions answered on the show? Submit them here!     You can now order my new book “I Didn’t Sign Up for This” here!    Ready to learn how to repair? Save now! Grab my REPAIR workshop       Looking to improve your relationship? Join me in my online program, Be Connected  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Fostering Secure Attachment, Connection, Repair with Our Kids & Beyond with Eli Harwood
08-08-2024
Fostering Secure Attachment, Connection, Repair with Our Kids & Beyond with Eli Harwood
In today's episode, Dr. Tracy welcomes Eli Harwood, a licensed therapist, author, and creator of the "Attachment Nerd" online community. Eli shares her personal journey of overcoming inherited attachment trauma, emphasizing the importance of breaking intergenerational cycles. Together, Dr. Tracy and Eli explore the pressures of parenting, emphasizing the value of attunement, co-regulation, and being present with children during painful moments rather than trying to eliminate their pain. Eli also introduces her new book, "Raising Securely Attached Kids," which offers insights and practical advice for parents. Key takeaways from this conversation include the importance of repair over perfection in relationships, the necessity of connection in parenting, and understanding that parenting is challenging because it requires confronting our own vulnerabilities. The episode highlights that fostering connection through vulnerability and repair is what truly strengthens relationships.  Be sure to keep up with Eli on Instagram @attachmentnerd and pre-order her new book here! Leave Dr. Tracy a voicemail here!  A special thank you to our incredible sponsors for making this show possible! Cozy Earth - Visit cozyearth.com and use code SHRINK at checkout for an exclusive 35% off. Links: Ready to deepen your connection? Download my 100 Questions!  Want your questions answered on the show? Submit them here!     You can now order my new book “I Didn’t Sign Up for This” here!    Ready to learn how to repair? Save now! Grab my REPAIR workshop       Looking to improve your relationship? Join me in my online program, Be Connected  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Understanding the Amygdala and Trauma Bonding with Dr. Kate Truitt
01-08-2024
Understanding the Amygdala and Trauma Bonding with Dr. Kate Truitt
In today’s episode, Dr. Tracy delves into how early childhood experiences shape our adult relationships with Dr. Kate Truitt, an esteemed clinical psychologist and neuroscientist known for her expertise in trauma and resilience. Dr. Truitt, founder of the Truitt Institute and CEO of the Amy Research Foundation, shares insights from her memoir, Keep Breathing, highlighting the powerful role of the amygdala—"Amy"—in shaping our responses to safety, lovability, and belonging. Their discussion covers the positive and powerful impact that showing personal vulnerability as therapists has had on their client relationships, the importance of connection, and the difference between codependency and trauma bonding. Dr. Kate expresses that while our past influences us, we have the power to choose healthier paths and that self-compassion is a key to healing and growth. Tune in to discover how understanding these dynamics can lead to deeper self-awareness and stronger, more fulfilling relationships.  Be sure to keep up with Dr. Kate on Instagram and visit her website here. Leave Dr. Tracy a voicemail here!  A special thank you to our incredible sponsors for making this show possible! Cozy Earth - Visit cozyearth.com and use code SHRINK at checkout for an exclusive 35% off. Links: Ready to deepen your connection? Download my 100 Questions!  Want your questions answered on the show? Submit them here!     You can now order my new book “I Didn’t Sign Up for This” here!    Ready to learn how to repair? Save now! Grab my REPAIR workshop       Looking to improve your relationship? Join me in my online program, Be Connected  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Matrescence & Beyond: Redefining Mommy Brain with Dr. Nikki Pensak
25-07-2024
Matrescence & Beyond: Redefining Mommy Brain with Dr. Nikki Pensak
It’s safe to say that "mommy brain" is due for a rebrand! In this episode, Dr. Tracy sits down with Dr. Nikki Pensak, a clinical psychologist, TEDx speaker and author of "Rattled," to discuss the challenges and opportunities of motherhood, particularly during the postpartum period. Dr. Nikki shares her journey from academia to becoming a mother, emphasizing the mental health needs of mothers often overlooked. They discuss the transformation of the maternal brain during matrescence, the pressures of social media, and the reality of baby bonding and breastfeeding challenges. Dr. Nikki rebrands "mommy brain" as a brilliant adaptation to motherhood's demands and advocates for early postpartum mental health care. They explore three pillars for thriving postpartum: mental health treatment, understanding motherhood, and thriving beyond birth trauma. The episode flips the narrative on motherhood, viewing it as a profound opportunity despite its challenges. Dr. Tracy concludes with actionable tips: self-compassion, incorporating movement, and practicing present-moment connection.    Be sure to keep up with Dr. Nikki on Instagram @drnikkipensak and grab a copy of her book here! Leave Dr. Tracy a voicemail here!  A special thank you to our incredible sponsors for making this show possible! Cozy Earth - Visit cozyearth.com and use code SHRINK at checkout for an exclusive 35% off. Loop - Visit loopearplugs.com and use code LOOPXDRTRACY for 10% off of your order. Links: Ready to deepen your connection? Download my 100 Questions!  Want your questions answered on the show? Submit them here!     You can now order my new book “I Didn’t Sign Up for This” here!    Ready to learn how to repair? Save now! Grab my REPAIR workshop       Looking to improve your relationship? Join me in my online program, Be Connected  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
From Escalation to Calm: Practical Tips for Dealing with Disagreements with Dr. Tracy and Greg
18-07-2024
From Escalation to Calm: Practical Tips for Dealing with Disagreements with Dr. Tracy and Greg
Greg, AKA, Dr. Tracy's favourite co-host and hubby is back this week to discuss strategies to de-escalate disagreements. In this episode, they emphasize the importance of understanding how escalation occurs and how to effectively de-escalate before diving into the deeper and necessary conversations. They share insights from their own relationship, highlighting how childhood experiences shape behaviour in relationships and the impact of perpetual conflicts. Dr. Tracy and Greg discuss the physical sensations of escalation, common negative communication patterns, and the importance of self-awareness, acknowledgment, and making agreements with your partner to take breaks and return to conflicts with a calmer mindset. They also cover practical techniques for self-regulation and co-regulation and answer a listener's voicemail about navigating loss and its impact on relationships.  Leave Dr. Tracy a voicemail here!  A special thank you to our incredible sponsors for making this show possible! Cozy Earth - Visit cozyearth.com and use code SHRINK at checkout for an exclusive 35% off. Loop - Visit loopearplugs.com and use code LOOPXDRTRACY for 10% off of your order. Links: Ready to deepen your connection? Download my 100 Questions!  Want your questions answered on the show? Submit them here!     You can now order my new book “I Didn’t Sign Up for This” here!    Ready to learn how to repair? Save now! Grab my REPAIR workshop       Looking to improve your relationship? Join me in my online program, Be Connected  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Parenthood, Perfectionism, and Finding Peace after Birth Trauma with Dr. Mona Amin
11-07-2024
Parenthood, Perfectionism, and Finding Peace after Birth Trauma with Dr. Mona Amin
Trigger warning: Traumatic birth experience   In today’s session, Dr. Tracy sits down with Dr. Mona Amin, a board-certified general pediatrician, online parenting educator, wife and mother. She shares her mission to provide relatable content for parents, aiming to instill confidence and calm in their parenting journey. In this episode, Dr. Mona candidly opens up about her traumatic birth story, the subsequent health challenges her family faced, how it affected her marriage, the importance of self-advocacy and the key role therapy played while navigating her postpartum reality. As a recovering perfectionist she also shares how she's learned to get comfortable in being uncomfortable and trust the healing process. Together, Dr. Mona and Dr. Tracy explore how traumatic experiences can shape relationships, the ongoing, unpredictable journey of parenthood, the need to prioritize therapy and how to maintain hope in the face of uncertainty.   Be sure to keep up with Dr. Mona on Instagram @pedsdoctalk and visit her website www.pedsdoctalk.com    Leave Dr. Tracy a voicemail here!  A special thank you to our incredible sponsors for making this show possible! Cozy Earth - Visit cozyearth.com and use code SHRINK at checkout for an exclusive 35% off. Loop - Visit loopearplugs.com and use code LOOPXDRTRACY for 10% off of your order. Links: Ready to deepen your connection? Download my 100 Questions!  Want your questions answered on the show? Submit them here!     You can now order my new book “I Didn’t Sign Up for This” here!    Ready to learn how to repair? Save now! Grab my REPAIR workshop       Looking to improve your relationship? Join me in my online program, Be Connected  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
What to Do When They Never Plan Date Nights
04-07-2024
What to Do When They Never Plan Date Nights
Tired of always being the initiator in your relationship? This week, Dr. Tracy addresses the common issue of "my husband doesn’t plan date nights," a struggle many listeners have shared. She discusses the prevalent belief in heterosexual relationships that men should instinctively know and plan for their partner's needs, emphasizing that healthy relationships require intentional effort and open communication. Dr. Tracy highlights the importance of recognizing different seasons in partnerships, acknowledging bids for connection, and separating self-worth from a partner's actions. She offers practical advice on creating a system for planning date nights, balancing the division of labor, and appreciating each partner's contributions. By understanding and communicating needs effectively, couples can improve their connection, intimacy, and overall relationship satisfaction.  Leave Dr. Tracy a voicemail here!  A special thank you to our incredible sponsors for making this show possible! ZocDoc - Go to Zocdoc.com/INYS and download the Zocdoc app for FREE. Then find and book a top-rated therapist, psychiatrist, or psychologist today. Links: Ready to deepen your connection? Download my 100 Questions!  Want your questions answered on the show? Submit them here!     You can now order my new book “I Didn’t Sign Up for This” here!    Ready to learn how to repair? Save now! Grab my REPAIR workshop       Looking to improve your relationship? Join me in my online program, Be Connected   Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
The Dos and Don’ts of Postpartum Visits with Renee Reina
27-06-2024
The Dos and Don’ts of Postpartum Visits with Renee Reina
The dynamic duo is back together! This week, Dr. Tracy welcomes back her fellow Canadian sister, Renee Reina, host of the top-ranking podcast The Mom Room, for an open and honest discussion about handling visitors after giving birth. Renee shares her personal experience and how her perspective on postpartum visits shifted after having her son, Milo. They distinguish between true support people and visitors, highlighting the importance of setting boundaries and prioritizing the mother's comfort and needs. The conversation covers cultural expectations, the challenges of navigating in-laws, and the guilt often associated with saying no to visitors. Through engaging listener voicemails, they tackle real-life scenarios, offering practical advice on setting expectations and advocating for one's needs. This episode is a must-listen for all the soon-to-be and new mom's out there!  Be sure to follow Renee on Instagram @thereneereina and listen to The Mom Room and Insufferable wherever you get your podcasts! Leave Dr. Tracy a voicemail here!  A special thank you to our incredible sponsors for making this show possible! ZocDoc - Go to Zocdoc.com/INYS and download the Zocdoc app for FREE. Then find and book a top-rated therapist, psychiatrist, or psychologist today. Links: Ready to deepen your connection? Download my 100 Questions!  Want your questions answered on the show? Submit them here!     You can now order my new book “I Didn’t Sign Up for This” here!    Ready to learn how to repair? Save now! Grab my REPAIR workshop       Looking to improve your relationship? Join me in my online program, Be Connected   Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Breaking Relationship Patterns with Amy Chan
06-06-2024
Breaking Relationship Patterns with Amy Chan
Have you ever wondered why you constantly end up in the same type of relationship? Or maybe you're contemplating whether or not you can continue on with your current partner. These are all common questions we've all asked ourselves at some point in our lives and will be addressing in today's conversation. In this episode, Dr. Tracy welcomes Amy Chan, founder of Breakup Bootcamp and author of "The Breakup Bootcamp: The Science of Rewiring Your Heart," to discuss why we stay in bad relationships and how to break harmful patterns. Amy shares insights from her own experiences and her work in helping people heal from heartbreak by understanding the deep-rooted reasons behind their relationship choices. They explore concepts like the attraction of deprivation and the sunk cost fallacy, highlighting why people stay in unfulfilling relationships and how to recognize these patterns. Amy also introduces the "shit bucket" theory, emphasizing that all relationships have challenges, and it's crucial to have realistic expectations and effective communication. This conversation offers valuable advice on nurturing oneself, maintaining a sense of self, and fostering mutual motivation and creativity in relationships, ultimately guiding us toward healthier, more fulfilling connections.    Be sure to follow Amy on Instagram, buy her book here, and visit her website here!   Leave Dr. Tracy a voicemail here!   A special thank you to our incredible sponsors for making this show possible! ZocDoc - Go to Zocdoc.com/INYS and download the Zocdoc app for FREE. Then find and book a top-rated therapist, psychiatrist, or psychologist today. Links: Ready to deepen your connection? Download my 100 Questions!  Want your questions answered on the show? Submit them here!     You can now order my new book “I Didn’t Sign Up for This” here!    Ready to learn how to repair? Save now! Grab my REPAIR workshop       Looking to improve your relationship? Join me in my online program, Be Connected   Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Putting Your Relationship First with Dr. Stan Tatkin
30-05-2024
Putting Your Relationship First with Dr. Stan Tatkin
In a world where we're encouraged to prioritize individualism, and set boundaries, the importance of our relationships can often get lost. In this week's episode, Dr. Tracy chats with Dr. Stan Tatkin, a renowned clinician, researcher, and author of the bestselling book "Wired for Love." They explore the concept of interdependence in relationships, using the three-legged race analogy to highlight the importance of teamwork. Dr. Tatkin emphasizes understanding our own and our partner's brains to foster secure and functioning relationships, addressing the impact of negativity bias and the pitfalls of social media diagnoses. They touch on secure attachment, the couple bubble, and aligning on priorities for lasting connections. Dr. Tatkin shares insights on conflict resolution, mutual relief during disagreements, and maintaining a strong partnership through mutual sensitivity and understanding. This conversation offers practical advice and profound insights to help listeners build resilient and loving relationships, highlighting why it's actually ok to put your relationship at the top of the priority list.    Be sure to follow Dr. Stan on Instagram and grab a copy of “Wired for Love” here.   Leave Dr. Tracy a voicemail here!   A special thank you to our incredible sponsors for making this show possible! ZocDoc - Go to Zocdoc.com/INYS and download the Zocdoc app for FREE. Then find and book a top-rated therapist, psychiatrist, or psychologist today. Loop - Visit loopearplugs.com and use my code LOOPXDRTRACY for 10% your order. Cozy Earth - Use code SHRINK for 35% off at cozyearth.com Links: Ready to deepen your connection? Download my 100 Questions!  Want your questions answered on the show? Submit them here!     You can now order my new book “I Didn’t Sign Up for This” here!    Ready to learn how to repair? Save now! Grab my REPAIR workshop       Looking to improve your relationship? Join me in my online program, Be Connected   Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices